Understanding Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy

Written by: Angela Derrick, Ph.D. & Susan McClanahan, Ph.D.

Date Posted: May 5, 2025 12:30 am

Understanding Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy

What is Parts Work, i.e., Internal Family Systems?

Internal Family Systems (IFS), sometimes referred to as Parts Work, is a therapeutic model developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz that views the mind as made up of distinct parts, each with its own perspective, emotions, and roles. Rather than viewing inner conflicts or negative emotions as signs of pathology, IFS sees them as a natural expression of parts that are trying, in their own ways, to protect and help the individual. At the core of IFS is the belief that every person has a “Self” — a calm, wise, and compassionate center — that can guide the healing of wounded or extreme parts.

In practice, IFS invites individuals to build relationships with their parts, learning to listen without judgment and to appreciate the intentions behind even the most disruptive behaviors. Over time, with the wise Self in the lead, protective parts can relax, and hurt parts (often called “exiles”) can be safely witnessed and healed. This process empowers people to move through old patterns with more choice and compassion, while gaining a deeper sense of wholeness and inner peace.

Who Can Benefit from IFS Therapy

Almost anyone can benefit from IFS Therapy because it meets people where they are with a spirit of curiosity and respect for their inner world. It can be especially helpful for those struggling with anxiety, depression, trauma, relationship challenges, perfectionism, or a harsh inner critic. People who have difficulties with emotional reactivity or deep self-doubt often find parts work beneficial. IFS offers a gentle yet powerful path to change, even for those who simply feel stuck in repetitive patterns.

Beyond clinical issues, Internal Family Systems can also support personal growth, creativity, and spiritual development. Even people without a specific “problem” often discover that parts work helps them access more self-compassion, inner clarity, and authenticity.

Parts Work Scenario no.1

Sara grew up in a home where emotional needs were often ignored, and sometimes met with anger. As an adult, she struggles with intense feelings of worthlessness and fear of abandonment, especially in close relationships. When she started IFS therapy, she discovered a very young part of her — an “exile” — that still carried the deep hurt and loneliness from those early years. She also noticed protective parts that made her withdraw from people or lash out when she felt vulnerable.

Through parts work, Sara learned to connect with her inner wise Self, sometimes called the inner loving parent. Any name that resonates can be chosen, such as the true Self, inner compass, or the inner healer, to name a few. Sara’s true Self can offer genuine compassion and attention to the hurt child part within her. She reassures the protective parts that she, as her strong and kind Self, is now capable of caring for that pain. Over time, the intense fear and shame begin to soften. Sara doesn’t just cope better — she actually feels different inside: more worthy, more connected, and less afraid to be herself with others.

Parts Work Scenario no.2

Imagine someone we’ll call Alex, who always feels anxious before big meetings at work. No matter how much he prepares, a part of him always panics, while another part criticizes him for not being “confident enough.” Through IFS, Alex learns to recognize that the anxious part is trying to protect him from judgment or failure, and the critical part believes that being harsh will push him to succeed. With the help of his authentic Self — that calm, compassionate inner leader — Alex is able to reassure these parts, understand their fears, and help them relax. Over time, the meetings feel less terrifying, and Alex feels more grounded and capable, not because the anxious and critical parts disappeared, but because they were listened to, appreciated, and no longer had to work so hard to be heard.

Why Might the Principles of IFS be Difficult to Adopt? (at least at first!)

Someone might struggle to take IFS seriously for several reasons. One common barrier is that the idea of having “parts” can sound strange or even childish at first — people might think it implies they’re broken or have multiple personalities, when actually it’s a very normal, healthy way of understanding the mind. Others may have strong “protector” parts that are skeptical of therapy altogether, fearing that getting close to painful memories will be overwhelming or destabilizing. In some cases, if someone has learned to survive by remaining highly intellectual or detached from their emotions, the deep emotional work of Internal Family Systems might feel too vulnerable or “soft” to trust right away.

Sometimes people hesitate because they are used to focusing on external problems (If they would change, I’d be fine). IFS shifts the focus inward, not in a blaming way, but by empowering self-leadership. That shift can feel scary if someone hasn’t experienced much safe, compassionate attention before, especially from themselves.

Becoming Open to the Idea of Parts Work

Here’s how people often start to open up to IFS, even if they’re skeptical at first. A big turning point usually happens when someone has even one small, real experience of a Self-to-part connection — like noticing a tiny bit of compassion for a part they used to hate or feeling a little lighter after getting curious instead of judgmental. That lived experience, even if it’s brief, often feels so different from the usual cycles of shame, blame, or overwhelm that it builds real trust. People realize, Oh, I’m not trying to force myself to change — I’m just getting to know myself better. And it actually feels good.

Additionally, a skilled therapist can make a huge difference by respecting people’s protectors instead of trying to push past them. When protectors feel honored rather than judged, they often soften just enough to allow healing to begin. IFS invites exploration at a pace that feels safe. Over time, even the most guarded parts can become willing to risk a little trust because they sense they are being treated as valuable, not broken.

In her work with clients, Dr. Angela Derrick has observed, when we can view the protector parts as serving an important function, we can understand their message and acknowledge its usefulness.  For instance, we might tell that part, I see that you mean well by trying to keep me safe.  As I move forward, I will keep my safety in mind while also not being paralyzed by fear that has kept me stuck.

A First Step

Here’s a very gentle first step someone could take. Instead of diving into full sessions or trying to “fix” anything, they could simply notice a moment when they feel a strong emotion, such as irritation, sadness, or fear — and pause for just a few seconds to ask themselves the following:

What part of me is feeling this?

No pressure to solve it, no need to dig deep. Just a soft noticing, like meeting a small character in a story. Maybe they realize, Oh, a part of me is scared I’ll mess up, or A part of me feels really defensive right now. That tiny shift — seeing the feeling as a “part” rather than the “whole truth” — opens a door.

If they want to go a little further, they might even say silently, I see you. I’m here.

Again, no fixing — just simple acknowledgment. This kind of small, respectful attention can be incredibly powerful because it starts building a relationship inside that is based on curiosity and compassion, not pressure or shame.

What Symptoms Might Indicate a Need for IFS Therapy?

We have compiled a list of symptoms and experiences to help you determine if IFS Therapy might be beneficial:

• Inner conflict — feeling like two (or more) parts of you are battling inside (e.g., Part of me wants to leave, but another part is terrified.)
• Harsh inner critic — hearing constant self-judgment or shame-driven thoughts that feel punishing or exhausting.
• Emotional reactivity — getting triggered quickly and intensely, even when you don’t want to, and not fully understanding why.
• Persistent anxiety or depression — especially when it feels like part of you is trapped in old emotions or hopelessness, even if “life is okay” on the outside.
• Feeling stuck — knowing what you should do but being unable to move forward, as if something invisible is blocking you.
• Perfectionism or people-pleasing — driven by deep fear of being rejected, judged, or “not enough.”
• Numbing, avoiding, or dissociating — checking out mentally or emotionally, sometimes without realizing it, especially around painful topics.
• Struggles with trust and vulnerability — wanting closeness but feeling unsafe letting others in.
• Repeating unhealthy patterns — in relationships, work, or self-care, despite strong efforts to change.
• Low self-worth or chronic shame — feeling fundamentally flawed, broken, or “too much” for others.
• Unresolved trauma — carrying emotional wounds from past experiences that still color your reactions today.

Basically, if someone feels like they are being run by painful emotions, stuck roles, or reactions, rather than being led by their deeper, calmer Self, that’s a sign IFS could open up real healing.

When we listen to our parts with compassion, we begin to heal them. And when we listen to the parts of others with compassion, we begin to heal them too.

~Dr. Richard Schwartz

Healing Through IFS Therapy

Here are some of the first positive changes people often notice when IFS starts helping:

• More inner calm.
  Even if life is still stressful, there’s more breathing room inside — emotions feel a little less overwhelming or “all-or-nothing.”
• Compassion for themselves.
  People begin to treat themselves more kindly, even when they’re struggling, seeing their reactions as parts trying to help, not as proof they are “bad” or “broken.”
• Clearer decision-making.
  Instead of being torn between battling parts (Should I stay or go?), people can hear the concerns of different parts and make thoughtful, Self-led choices.
• Less reactivity.
  Triggers still happen, but there’s often a small pause — enough time to respond more wisely rather than automatically.
• More forgiveness (inside and outside).
  As parts heal, people often find it easier to forgive themselves and others, not by excusing harm, but by understanding the deeper pain behind actions.
• Feeling more “whole.”
  Rather than feeling like a mess of contradictions, people start to feel like all their parts belong — that their inner world makes sense.
• Deeper, more authentic relationships.
  When someone leads with their true Self, they show up with more openness, boundaries, and kindness, which often improves how others respond to them.

These changes usually start small, but they build over time like a ripple effect.
Even one little moment of Self-energy, like noticing, “Wow, I’m actually feeling curious instead of judgmental right now,” is a sign of healing.

About SpringSource Psychological Center

At SpringSource, our therapists are skilled and experienced in various evidence-based modalities, including Internal Family Systems (IFS). We recognize that the path to healing is unique for each individual, and we focus on compassionately addressing your specific needs. We are available for in-person and virtual appointments at our downtown Chicago and Northbrook, IL, offices.

Contact us today at 224-202-6260 or info@springsourcecenter.com to learn more and schedule your free initial consultation. We would love to hear from you.